Here's One That Oughta Get'cha Talkin'

If you haven't seen this yet:
http://blogs.chron.com/talkingtolerance/2009/09/needed_petloving_atheists_in_t.html

Some ingenious entrepenuer has found a way to make a killing by offering to take care of your pet after the rapture. Chances are, if you believe in the rapture, you probably believe your dog can't get into heaven.

I'm not going to pass judgement on that opinion, but I will tell you that I don't believe it can be heaven without them, no matter what my Teachings of the Catholic Church class says about heaven and your memory of life on earth.

All for now.

I Need a Sheep

Pete, our Aussie Shepherd/Terrier mix, won't stop herding Rosie, our black lab mix. Whenever he senses I'm about to head upstairs for the night, he goes to get her, and follows her upstairs, nipping at her heels. Moreover, he'll often trap her in the kitchen or a bedroom, and I may not notice until I hear her whining. Then, when I look over, he's standing guard in front of the door, just looking at her.

Pete loves having a job. I've got to think of one for him that doesn't drive Rosie crazy.

All for now.

A Bear in a Studebaker

I've been thinking about that part of The Muppet Movie where Rolf & Kermit are singing "I Hope That Something Better Comes Along," which, if you haven't seen it, what? Okay, here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_IctDbZ-t1I

Anyway, after Rolf sings, "the pitter patter of soles, the little feet of tadpoles," and Kermit corrects him by saying "Um, Rolf, tadpoles don't have feet," Rolf says "Oh, sorry about that," which is very polite of him, because I would have looked Kermit right in the eye and said, "I AM A TALKING DOG, PLAYING A SONG THAT I JUST MADE UP FOR YOU ON THE PIANO."

That would've shut him up.

All for now.

I'm Up Early

...because it's surgery day for Pete.

I don't want to get all Bob Barker on you, but if you have cats or dogs and no plans for progeny, please spay or neuter them. It removes animal shelters from the equation when it comes to euthanization of a population of strays that spirals beyond their budget / control. What's more, it frees your pet from urges you can't give them the freedom to act upon.

Anyway, reserve your best wishes / prayers / etc. for Pete today, and especially for the doctors who will handle his procedure, and for the vet techs / nurses who care for him before and after. He can be quite a handful, and I've already pissed of SNAP once.

All for now.

Delilah!

Continuous Christmas favorites are back on Sunny 99.1 FM, which means I'm going to be hearing a lot more of Delilah, the DJ who cares about you: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delilah_(radio_show)

I like to imagine Delilah broadcasts her show from beside a cozy fire on a bearskin rug, while sipping hot chocolate petting her eight pound persian cat, Snoofles, all while on the other side of the glass, her producers are trying to convince her of how bad the fire, animal fibers, and hot liquids are for their radio equipment. But Delilah cares not.

To change the subject completely, I have some serious concerns about my washing machine, but I know so little about how washing machines work that I have not fixed it. If anyone knows why a washer would try to travel across the room on spin cycle by violently shaking itself, please let me know.

In other news, I had my first Puerto Rican Thanksgiving yesterday, and I found it to be very, very tasty. If you're wondering what it's like, it is very much like a regular thanksgiving, but with yucca and far fewer vegetables. My plan for future years is to introduce my tropical in-laws to more colorful side dishes for the sake of everyone's hearts and bowels, both of which are hurting from an overabundance of starch right now.

Finally, it's Rosie's birthday this week. I have no idea when she was born exactly, since we adopted her at ten weeks and she was born in a ditch somewhere, but according to our vet, she was born in the last week of November 2005. If you know or love my three-year old dog, she has told me she'll be accepting lots of attention in lieu of monetary gifts.

All for now.